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mom anxiety // people freak me out

Walk in the school building with your head spinning. It is hard to focus on talking to people when it is all {so} overwhelming. Crap, starting to feel the tunnel vision coming quickly today. Maybe this is what over stimulation feels like? Well, I am not sure but all I know for sure in this moment is that this tile on the floor looks nice (maybe trying to make myself laugh here? Not sure) I know I cannot look up. It is all just too much. Just smile, Em. Maybe they will smile back and walk away. Man // I know her and I REALLY want to talk to her but today, in this moment i just cannot. It is all too much. Focus on the task, complete it and leave. This is my goal. Repeat 555 until task is complete.

This is just a second of thoughts that happen during social anxiety. Its overwhelming. It repeats a lot. It is debilitating and one of the worst things I have found recently is that I HAVE to go do things. I have to take actions because it is what my kids need from me as their mother. They need me to be at conferences, meetings, soccer games, unpack your backpack night (man that was the worst) etc.

All these things with LOTS of people are places we need to be as supportive parents for our kiddos but we also have to discover ways that we can be happy too. Those of us who struggle with these social challenges need to find strategies that make this BETTER, opposed to freaking out or avoiding the whole task in general.

For me it is important to learn & discover ways to {grow} as a human. In this process, I make sure I am explaining to my kiddos a little bit about me and I also explain to them that EVERYONE is different. They need to know that how they feel and how everyone else feels is completely different. In every single moment. {ideally making them more empathetic, right?}

But then, also make sure I push myself to enjoy more things.

So what are some things we can do to DEAL with these unavoidable situations as adults?

TALK - talk to your loved ones & explain how you feel. {or will feel} This will take time as the closest people to you will probably not have the same social anxiety. They will not UNDERSTAND but the more you can explain how it feels, the more empathetic they can be around these situations. They can also begin to support you during these times.

PLAN -make a plan to excuse yourself or take a breather if you need. Give yourself grace. Even if you are alone with your kiddos and you need to tell them to come outside with you or to the bathroom with you to breathe. DO THAT. Have a plan going in & use it if you need to, sister.

CALM -take something to help you calm down. For me, this is CBD oil. Everyone has their own thing & i will not give suggestions here (ha) but if you need, take something that can calm your nerves a bit.

Social anxiety is a lot. It is a lot to uncover. I had been unknowingly been “dealing” with social anxiety as an adult with alcohol. I discovered this as I needed to support my kiddos DURING THE DAY and I didn’t want to drink to support my kids. To each their own, of course but for me, this is how I discovered how I had been coping with these situations for as long as I can recall.

I cannot wait to uncover more of social anxiety FOR YOU my friend. This can be our safe space.


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